(CNN) – Donald Trump assured American voters Thursday night that despite what Marco Rubio had suggested, there was “no problem” with the size of his hands — or anything else. “Look at those hands, are they small hands?” the front-runner for the GOP presidential nomination said, raising them for viewers to see. “And, he referred to my hands — ‘if they’re small, something else must be small.’ I guarantee you there’s no problem. I guarantee.”
“Donald Trump Defends size of his penis” Yes, that was an actual CNN debate headline. No one is shocked though, it was a matter of time before a literal dick-measuring contest took place on the Republican Debate stage. At this point, Donald Trump could walk over and punch Ted Cruz right in the dick (which I really hope he does) and I would not be surprised. Anything is possible in this clown-car republican race.
In case you missed the origin of this ‘debate issue’, Rubio implied Trump had a small dick at a rally last week (video below).
Now obviously that was pretty low of Rubio, but as he suggests “If anyone deserves it, Trump deserves it after the personal attacks he has given”. Which is true, but I thought even the Donald would take the high road here. I was WRONG obviously. Being the insecure ego-maniac Trump is, he couldn’t help himself, he had to rebut. There was no other option in his mind.
C’mon man! You were almost NOT the most pathetic politician of the week. The lowest point throughout the entire GOP campaign came last week when Rubio implied you had a small dick. Now the lowest point in the entire campaign is when on the Presidential Debate stage last night, you HAD to let the American people know that you don’t have a tiny dick. Despite the buffoonery of it, this was important. It was important because it showed how truly thin-skinned Donald Trump is that he HAD to respond to the criticism of his hands and implied penis size. I know pundits and fellow republicans talk Trump’s temperament all the time, but this was without a doubt the biggest tell that the guy doesn’t have the chops to be president.
ALLLLL THAT BEING SAID… the most amazing part of all this is that viewers still polled Teflon Don as having won the debate in overwhelming fashion.
This is just mind boggling, especially on a night where John Kasich probably had his best performance of the debate season discussing substantive policy on domestic and foreign issues. Who the hell are these people saying that Donald won the debate? This is a Republican Presidential Debate, not Wild N’ Out with Nick Cannon. The more this campaign progresses, the more I am assured that our country is mostly comprised of brain-dead morons. Not to go Trump on everyone, but we should seriously consider intelligence screenings before someone is allowed to cast a ballot.
-El Chapo
